1. Brighter, Bolder Kids

Self-confidence is one of the most important qualities we can instill in our children. Kids who feel sure of themselves are happier, more independent, and more likely to succeed. So it's no wonder that child development experts have long offered parents a steady stream of suggestions on how to raise confident kids. But now some of the conventional wisdom is being reconsidered. Research suggests that promoting self-confidence is a more complex and nuanced process than we originally thought. Let's look at some old ways of thinking and the newer, more enlightened approach.

Old Rule: Offer lots of Praise
New Rule: Praise less, but praise more authentically.

Constant compliments can begin to sound hollow, even to a young child. It's far better to praise your little one only when you mean it. Praise the child for the effort, not just the end result - teaches her that hard work pays off. That message leads to far more self-confidence than empty congratulations.

Old Rule: Criticism kills confidence
New Rule: Offer realistic feedback, delivered with kindness.

Your 5 yr old brings you a thank-you note that she wrote to grandma and you notice that it's just a bunch of scribbles. It's fine to tell her, 'This isn't your best effort, I've seen you write better notes. Why don't you try to improve on this?' By giving you child an honest assessment, you're showing her that your appraisals can be trusted. This will encourage her to try harder next time.

Old Rule: Explain everything
New Rule: Sometimes, it's okay to simply take charge.

Every once in a while, it's fine to say, because I'm the parent and I said so. We'll discuss it later'. Such an announcement tells your child that sometimes he has to do things without understanding the reasons. Ultimately, your child will see that the things you demand from him makes sense. If he goes to his room for quite time, he'll discover that he's less tired and cranky later. Such lessons will show him that he can depend on adults he loves most - you - to know what's best for him.

Old Rule: The more your child can do, the more confident she'll be
New Rule: Do less, connect more.

When your child has too many activities on her agenda, not only does she tend to skate through them, but you inevitably end up trying to manage her life - not share with her. The fact is, being relentlessly managed does not build a child's self-esteem. It robs her of a real connection to you. So it's best to cut back on your child's busy schedule and give her more downtime with the family. Chances are, she as well as you, will feel more relaxed. Then the connection between you and your child will grow, strengthening the loving bond that the true foundation for brighter, bolder, more confident kids.

Source: Condensed from an article from Parents Magazine (June 2004), by Ron Taffel, Ph.D

2. Hadith Corner

'Uthman bin 'Affan's Hadith, may Allah be pleased with him. He called for ablution water and this is how he performed the ablution. He washed his hands thrice. He then rinsed his mouth and cleaned his nose with water (three times). He then washed his face three times, then washed his right arm up to the elbow three times, then washed his left arm like that, then wiped his head; then washed his right foot up to the ankle three times, then washed his left foot like that, and then said: I saw Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) perform ablution like this ablution of mine. Then Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said: He who performs ablution like this ablution of mine and then stood up (for the Prayer) and offered two rak'ahs of the Prayer without allowing his thoughts to be distracted, all his previous sins are expiated.

3. Teacher Profiles

PTC BUZZ Student Interviewer Sara Abuhadba interviewed Mrs Quadri.

1. Why is having self-confidence so important?

Mrs Quadri: In order to accomplish anything, you have to believe that you are capable of doing it. If Allah (swt) loves you what reason do you have not to love yourself?

2. What advice would you give to Averroes students on how to build their self-confidence?

Mrs Quadri: I would tell them to always remember that no one is greater than Allah (swt), and you can do anything if you put your mind to it.

3. How did you build you own self-confidence?

Mrs Quadri: whenever I feared someone or something I would repeat in my mind, I don't fear this person, I fear the God of this person. And that would put my heart at ease.

4. Building Bridges During Christmas

Christmas is an annual Christian religious holiday commemorating the birth of Prophet Jesus, peace be upon him. For many Muslims, it becomes an issue of what stand they should take. Muslims have to remember that for practicing Christians, Christmas really is about Jesus.

Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, was so accommodating of Christians that according to the two earliest Islamic historians, Ibn e Saad and Ibn Hisham, the Prophet even allowed a delegation of 60 Byzantine Christians from Najran in Yemen to worship in his own mosque in Madinah. Lead by their bishop (Usquf), they had come to discuss a number of issues with him. When time of their prayer came, they asked the Prophet's permission to perform this in the mosque. He answered, "Conduct your service here in the mosque. It is a place consecrated to God."

Christmas is a great time to relate to our neighbors. We should not forget though, that "relating" does not mean "preaching". Dawa cannot be made in a rude manner. Allah says in the Quran: "Invite (all) to the Way of your Lord with wisdom and beautiful advice, and reason with them by ways that are the best and most gracious: because your Lord knows best, (those) who have strayed from His Path, and those who receive guidance " (Quran, 16:125).

In particular, Allah says: "Do not argue with the People of the Book unless it is in the politest manner, except for those of them who do wrong. Say: 'We believe in what has been sent down to us and what has been sent down to you. Our God and your God is [the same] One, and we are Muslims before Him'" (Quran, 29:46).

A starting point for a discussion about Christmas could be the Islamic belief in all Books revealed by Allah and all Prophets sent by Him. In this discussion, special emphasis could be made on Prophet Jesus. Non-Muslims are often surprised to discover that Muslims also believe in this noble Prophet and his great mother Mary (peace be upon her).

Remember that respect does not mean compromise. This article is not asking you to compromise anything. You have freedom of religion given by God to believe in what you believe in. But in a world where conflict is increasing, a Muslim should be a bridge-builder and a peacemaker.

Source: Soundvision.com